Ni**as in Paris
The City of Lights Mike’s Twitter My wedding was a success in the way wet gunpowder is a success: it looked normal enough but was ultimately a dud. However, one of the few things I remember that was...
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Life of the Party 2 (2021) RUMORS, Plot, Cast, and Release Date News – WILL...
@HalfGuarded Melissa McCarthy can do everything, from drama to drama/comedy to comedy to action/comedy. She’s one of the few leading ladies in H-Town that is funny as hell and according to a...
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Avengers: Infinity War has started production – and there’s video to prove it
I should write more about this. Maybe I will on a later day. For now, it’s a Friday night. I’m about to turn 34. I’m watching tv alone but I still just wanted to get this up. I was that happy with...
View Article[BEHOLD] The Secret Leaked Avengers: Infinity War Trailer
The Marvel Universe @HalfGuarded I saw Justice League the other day. Don’t bother. I know people think action movies are shallow and devoid of substance but this was a bridge too far. I literally...
View ArticleAvengers: Infinity War International Trailer from Japan Land
Not America @HalfGuarded They call this an International Trailer for Avengers: Infinity War Which it is, because Japan is Not-America and thus international but I never see one for Portugal. Or...
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Groundhog Day 2 (2021) RUMORS, Plot, Cast, and Release Date News – WILL THERE...
@HalfGuarded I got a call the other day from an agent who made me swear to be quiet about who he is but he told me there are now plans to make a second Groundhog Day movie. He gave me a few nuggets...
View ArticleA Brand New Avengers: Infinity War Trailer!
The Marvel Universe @HalfGuarded I believe I’m getting older. The excitement I felt for the first Avengers film isn’t there the way it is for the third go-around, which surprises me. This is the...
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Dirty Work 2 (2021) RUMORS! Should There Be a Dirty Work 2?!
@HalfGuarded Dirty Work is, without question, the most underrated comedy of all time. Personally, I think it is the greatest comedy of all time, and since that isn’t the opinion of the world, it is...
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Green Light by Lorde; aka: GUESS WHAT’S STUCK IN MIKE’S HEAD?!
@HalfGuarded I like to imagine there are a few of you out there who dutifully read this site two or three times a day. At this point, you’re obsessed with me but you know it keep your distance. But...
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Get Hard 2 (2021) RUMORS – SHOULD THERE BE a Get Hard 2?!
@HalfGuarded When I walked into the theater to see Get Hard, I was ill prepared for the movie I saw. Boy, I felt awkward in my gimp suit. Thankfully, a Hollywood secret super agent tells me there...
View ArticleBack in the USSR; aka: Guess What’s Stuck in Mike’s Head?!
Moscow, USSR 1983 @HalfGuarded History is written by the victors but sometimes they don’t seem to fully appreciate what they’ve won. When Ronald Reagan single handedly defeated the Soviet Union, he...
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Tropic Thunder 2 (2021) RUMORS & NEWS – SHOULD THERE BE a Tropic Thunder 2?!
@HalfGuarded Les Grossman saved Tom Cruise’s career. Before Cruise starred as the foul mouthed Hollywood agent – based on several real big shot agents, including one who may now have been outed as...
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Into the Woods 2 (2021) RUMORS & NEWS – SHOULD THERE BE a Into the Woods 2?!
@HalfGuarded Lots of big stars, singing and dancing, making a mockery of children’s stories – sounds like Hollywood, am I right? (Note: This post is updated with all additional information as it...
View ArticleDamn It Feels Good to be a Gangsta by Geto Boys; AKA: Guess What’s Stuck in...
@HalfGuarded This one, I know why it’s stuck in my head: Office Space. It was on TV, I watched it, I heard this song playing, and now it’s stuck in my perfect head. Wanna listen with me? Wanna be...
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Tammy 2 (2021) RUMORS & NEWS – SHOULD THERE BE a Tammy 2?!
@HalfGuarded Melissa McCarthy is the cousin of Jenny McCarthy. Who saw that coming? I mean, who saw that the fat chef from Gilmore Girls would become arguably the biggest female comedic star in the...
View ArticleSOLO: Not a Butthole but a Whole Trailer
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away…. @HalfGuarded Han Solo isn’t his real and that’s someone’s idea of adding character depth. Morons. I’m sure it’ll be a good movie everyone needs a name...
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George Lucas Killed Star Wars and It Cannot Be Resurrected
A long time ago, A Galaxy Far, Far Away @HalfGuarded George Lucas killed Star Wars and that was his right; God can kill his creation if he so chooses. With Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens,...
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Why Star Wars Ruined Filmmaking
Taking a glance at the highest grossing films of 1970 shows you just how much the motion picture industry has changed over the last 45 years. Of the top ten highest grossing U.S. movies, three were...
View ArticleAnd Now, A Scene From Robocop
Detroit Mike’s Twitter The post And Now, A Scene From Robocop appeared first on HalfGuarded.com.
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Are Star Wars Fans Racist? Am I? … Wait, What?
A Long Time Ago A Galaxy Far, Far Away @HalfGuarded Today is Star Wars day. I know it came out in some not-America places already but that doesn’t count. People can pretend it does but look at box...
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